Not Up in Here!

Whether you are aware of this or not, you are solely in control of your title.  When people victimize themselves, it is just that- they are attaching the title "victim" to their persona.  No unfortunate circumstance, environment or factor outside of one's thinking has the power to make someone a victim.  It is only when you take pity upon yourself that you become the undesirable victim....isn't this great news?!  It's fabulous that you never essentially have to be a victim or loser or any other product of negative circumstance.  When bad things happen you can easily extract yourself from the victim pitfall by uttering a phrase from one of my favorite movies - The Hangover, "Not Up in Here!"  This translates to- this is not happening or  I won't let this happen.  So now should you find yourself in a bad situation, where maybe some awful circumstances or outcomes have found a way into your life, you can bypass the entire state of despair, just think "NOT UP IN HERE." Then you may begin taking proactive measures to move yourself into a better place, working away from the negative situation or environment;  refuse to make yourself a victim...there's no victim up in here.

Mini things are the new trend...like cupcakes and emotional breakdowns.

Everyone has those moments when things seem too overwhelming or scary or life just seems impossible to cope with at the moment.  While I am PositivB, I am also a real person and understand that when life presents us with tough situations simply saying "ohh everything will be fine" and not dealing with any of anxiety is really impossible; not to mention repressing these feelings is also just unhealthy.  So I propose that in moments of extreme stress have a "mini meltdown," more specifically one that lasts no more than 3 minutes give or take.  Heres why this works so well:  In having this mini emotions-fest you can release that tension which is pervading every fiber of your being while at the same time not wasting an unnecessary amount of time wallowing in your own self pity.  As important as it is to release the tension that you're feeling, it is also important to proactively tackle the problem.  The anxiety will only truly go away when the problem is resolved.  Three minutes allows for that release without cutting into the law of diminishing returns.  Those first few minutes when you let your emotions run wild will be much more gratifying than those coming later on.   There's no need to waste more time feeling less relief after you've let out a good yell or had a good cry for 3 minutes. So when the world just seems to be too much to handle take a step back have a mini meltdown, then grab a mini-cupcake (or your favorite dessert of choice) and tackle the issue.   

Decisions Decisions

When we have to decide whether or not to do something, also known as saying "yes" or "no" it seems that there are only 2 choices we can pick from.  But there is actually a third- complete avoidance of making a decision at all.  We try to avoid dealing with the negative by completely dodging the decision making process altogether.   This may seem like a quick fix, but it is actually worse than simply rejecting an  idea.  Blatantly ignoring someone by not responding can stir up feelings of anger (ie. they may feel you dont consider them important enough to give a response to)  from response requesting party- anger that could have been easily avoided.  Life is a little messy, we cannot please everyone, and yes sometimes by making a choice we may end up having to face the unpleasant music.  However the positive part about saying no to an idea is that at least you have made a decision; you have shown that you possess character and more importantly a backbone.  Without a backbone you are just a jellyfish- you are better than a jellyfish, so make a decision!

Compliments

When someone pays you a compliment you have two roads you may take with it, either accept it happily or wonder what is the hidden agenda behind this compliment?  All too often we take the latter path, killing the joy or positivity that the compliment could impart on our soul.  Why attach a negative stigma to something that could essentially brighten your day or make you smile?  You deserve the happiness, so throw away your dissection tools and reap the benefits of compliments given to you.  Compliments are one of life's financially free and calorie free treats- enjoy one today.

Forever Young

Everyday try to laugh at something completley immature; no feeling replaces that of feeling young.

Positivity Found

The idea of positive versus negative classification of any element of life is fairly easy to understand at its most basic level.  As we go through life our minds are constantly categorizing our experiences as being positive or negative.  The outcome of feeling that a certain experience has either enhanced or diminished our life has a significant impact on how we interact with the world.  The feelings accompanied with positivity create a natural attraction.  Simply put, when you meet someone who complains or is initially melancholy it is normal to want to remove yourself from this person's presence.  Conversely when meeting someone who is passionate, energetic and just filled with joy it is common to gravitate back toward that person.  This is greatly expanded upon in the book The Secret which discusses the whole law of attraction.

It is certainly not always easy to be that happy go lucky figure all the time.  In fact it would not be normal to only experience feelings related to the positive side of life; after all how would we know what is positive if we did not know of anything negative.  However, it is important to try and draw positivity out of any situation despite how negative the experience may be as a whole.  Food poisoning from a restaurant?  Well you will not be going back to that establishment and thus are preventing another instance of that from occurring in the future.  A breakup with a significant other?  First off nothing is ever set in stone when it comes to relationships, but chances are you did learn a great deal about what you need/want/will give in the next relationship to make it more successful.  Loss of money?  Chances are you will be able to recognize and avoid the situation which caused the loss and thus prevent a future loss from occurring in the same way.  It is all essentially about growing from experience and allowing mistakes (or the negative) to lead us to an ultimately higher quality of life.  If you can take away one positive point from every negative experience then you not only grew but also increased your level of attractiveness.

It is not about running around with a permanent smile tattooed to your face but more so understanding that if it didn't kill you then you survived and that in itself is something positive.

Happy Jew Year...I'm UP!